Trusting Yourself


Trust yourself. Create the kind of self that you will be happy to live with all your life. Make the most of yourself by fanning the tiny, inner sparks of possibility into flames of achievement.

– Golda Meir

Trusting yourself is hard to do when you have let yourself down time and time again. You promise yourself that you will get to sleep at a decent hour but instead you find yourself playing video games far into the night and sleeping right through your alarm clock. You promise your self to get your work in on time but that rarely happens. You promise yourself that you will get yourself organized but find yourself living in chronic disorganization. Your friends and family hope that you will get your life together with the help of new medications, therapy or coaching but it never seems to work out. When the promises that you make to yourself are broken you learn that you cannot trust yourself. Your intentions are good but the follow through is weak. The road to hell is paved with good intentions.

You might promise yourself to:

  • be on time for appointments.
  • get your home cleaned up and organized.
  • use a calendar and planner.
  • pay your bills on time.
  • exercise on a regular basis.
  • remember birthdays.
  • stop making impulsive decisions.
  • stop wasting time surfing the web or playing video games.

You make yourself these promises but not much changes. How do you become a person who can be trusted to keep the promises you make to yourself? Is it worth trying when you have not been successful? It depends. You may be perfectly happy continuing to live in chaos. But what do you do if those things are causing you pain? What do you do if you are tired of making excuses?

Take a step in the right direction. Pick one area of your life you would like to change and visualize how that change would look. It doesn’t matter where you start or what you choose to work on but start small.

  • Start anywhere.
  • Make a plan.
  • Take a baby steo.
  • Share your plan with a supportive friend.
  • Write down your plan and post it where you can see it.
  • Reward yourself when you stick to the plan. Forgive yourself when you don’
  • Keep going even when you forget to work your plan for a day, a week or a month.

Every time you remember to work on creating a positive change and take a step forward you are learning to trust yourself. When you can trust yourself life will get better and others will trust you too.

Kathy Sussell is an ADHD coach in Brooklyn, NY. She helps teens, college students and adults with ADHD with time management, planning and prioritizing, getting started with and finishing tasks, organizing paper and objects and improving social skills. She is the organizer of the ADHD Women’s Meetup Group that meets every month in downtown Brooklyn. For more information visit her website: or email Kathy at

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